I love supporting #SMBs or just plain #talent & okay, so she is my my beloved aunty Carol Anne Pappalardo who I love infinitely & a day. BUT no bias here as in her ‘heyday’ she won the #gordonflackdavison #designer of her class .. so we bringing this most #talented lady out that woodwork! I mean these jeans! Send her yours & hey 👋 who is Stella?
Turning 38 and thank goodness genetically blessed from both folks physically and with youthful looks (knees now do feel the rain coming though 🙂 ), seems like a good time to repost these words I wrote in the middle of a game farm under a star filled African sky next to a mesmerising fire.
I was full of hope and yet I guess whilst the words were straight from the bottom of this heart, I don’t think I was quite ready to be … discovered let alone discover someone and give them my all.
I am ready now…. BUT not ready to discover just anybody. He must be my soulmate and best friend, my forever one, the man who loves me when I am no longer youthful looking but still blessed with the same kind heart and sense of humour ( perhaps with less wits about me but still witty) …because I know that I am capable of; and want that soul quenching, inner beauty loving…forever happiness.
If you asked me what I wanted my darling a thousand times over it would be the same thing,
I want a life filled with adventure, never letting the mundane and boring become a part of who we are,
My love, I want to explore the earth: in its entirety, every last crevice of you, the earth, the oceans and each little thing that the moon shines upon and my love, I want to explore this with you …
Darling if you had to ask me what would make my heart happy and what would make my soul come alive I would tell you this;
Take my heart and hold it in your hand as though it was the very thing that keeps you alive,
Guard it and guide it,
Treat it with the utmost and gentle care, but never allow it to grow tired and still,
As my heart sweet darling needs to be touched and whispered to: so that your heart too, beats with the fire of a thousand African sunsets.
My love if you want to know the secret to hearing my laughter erupting from the depths of my very soul just know the answer lies in allowing me to be me,
for my love, my beauty lies not in the colour of my eyes nor the shape of my lips but rather in the way I live;
to feel free and alive;
And laughter, my love, is the way my heart sings, it allows you to pen lyrics to the sweetest melody your ears have yet to hear.
My darling if you want to know how to make your arms my safe haven then simply do this –
Treat me my sweet sweet darling as though I were the most special and incredible gift;
hold me in your arms, unwrap each layer that encases my body, heart and soul
Do this with care my darling as the rarest gifts need to be opened slowly and patiently in order to truly appreciate what lies inside the gilded paper,
My love, the answers to most of the questions your mind yearns to know are simple:
For darling they are the very questions you have had the answer to, since the beginning of your mortal time.
I know I keep reiterating that my blog is real, raw, honest and everything that the digital world doesn’t quite adhere to. Odd. I know as it my job. Perhaps that is why i see it for what it really is… and whilst my writing and grammar is completely imperfect on my blog ( OCD I am with clients),
I write as if pen in hand, straight from the heart, sometimes it is emotional, sometimes funny and others just what I love.
I write these posts in the hopes someone can relate to them, that they can and will encourage. In a world where people look perfect and lead perfect lives …. antonym right there. I see more and more girls and boys alike struggling to keep up with this false idea of perfection. Suicides at 9 years old, how devastating – society and social media; what have you done?
Ok, So enough of me blabbing, I guess I should get to the point of this post.
It’s a little more on that legend, the one who beat terminal cancer against all odds countless times, my hero and muse – the girl I get to call my best friend and sister. Debbie Lee Bayvel.
I look back at all I have written on my incredible sister and it is all about her bravery and courage. Strength and determination over 32 years. Her Faith and her faithfulness and of course her fighting spirit and never give up attitude. She has a story of bravery like no other and yet; what I never delve in to and as a lady who will go out in pajamas to the petrol station or grocery store, I still love being manicured, having my hair perfect and looking good – if I don’t feel good, sometimes I won’t enjoy my time out. Self conscious, its become what society dictates and we accept it. Perfection or nothing.
And then I wake up and SEE Deb’s (well after living with her for so long, I only see her beauty and bravery – I really do) But I am still astonished at THE MOST astounding bravery of the girl I live with, and what she accepts when she looks in a mirror. Imperfection. Scars over most of her body, lack of hair that will never grow back, gouges of muscle and tissue out of her tiny back and legs for skin grafts, a limp from a tumour removal on her pelvis and countless reconstructive operations, for purpose – not pretty.
AND yet my sister is absolutely magnificent and I hold no bias. She really is.
I wrote this post not only to let you know Debs’is so brave in yet another way, but rather as we live in a time where looks are sadly, practically everything. I was there, I went through it. Wanting botox and every lifting, anti-aging, filling cream and potion I could find. It was short lived as I have never been less happy with ME in my life. I now believe in growing old gracefully, embracing the laugh lines, loving me for me inside not out. Deb’s your influence has been the inspiration for that. And, I am happy – how can I not be with I am created by the most perfect Creator ever. How can i betray his love of what He made me, by wanting to be something else?
And so, to the young girls, the middle aged and sadly not limited to girls. I am not saying don’t take care of you – always do. Be the best possible REAL you. JUST ALWAYS, ALWAYS REMEMBER, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AS YOU ARE. YOU ARE PERFECT. YOU ARE WONDERFUL YOU ARE A REFLECTION OF THE MOST PERFECT PERSON EVER, YOUR CREATOR UP ABOVE.
PLEASE, stop scrolling through Instagram and Facebook and craving botox, and fillers, vampire facials, face lifts, false lashes and lips. DON’T let anyone bully another for their external appearance – you may save a life.
Start by looking on the inside. helping others, finding YOUR purpose, your confidence, and everything good and beautiful about who you are.
I can promise you this, one day you will wake up and look in the mirror and love that reflection – cellulite and all. One day you will look in the mirror and see a glow from true happiness – that only comes from being YOU. One day you will notice that just as I do not see my sisters ‘flaws’no-one will see yours, as your confidence and inner strength will hide any imperfection you might have.
And every-time that craving to be a fake perfect starts, watch this video AND REMEMBER YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.